the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize