There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
