And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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