So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize