Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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