my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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