He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
