Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
