...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
