I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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