My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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