bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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