The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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