She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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