And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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