Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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