my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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