I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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