Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
