Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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