talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
