You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she looked like the before picture.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
