i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
