What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
