woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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