but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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