at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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