your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize