know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
