Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
