he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
