so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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