he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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