I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
