oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize