is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
