girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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