im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Mom said you looked used
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
