Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
40s are totally the cure
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I think my moral compass just broke
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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