normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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