So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I smell like Dick and happiness
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
