Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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