I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
