He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize