That's intense
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
so much tequila, so little girl.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
