STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
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