There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
