So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
