Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize