think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
