hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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